Thursday, October 15, 2009

WHY PRETTY HOT CHICKS DATE UGLY MEN.

Why are all the hottest chicks attracted to the ugliest/retarded/no-talent guys? 

Even though I am not A CHICK, I am pretty sure I can identify a guy who conforms to ideals of form and proportion from one that does not, just as easy as I can differentiate between Mozart and William Hung? no?

What, does getting a boyfriend with a pitiful facial endowment provide further contrast and by so, amplifying their beauty? Don't they already have ugly girlfriends to fill in that role?

I am sick and tired of seeing William Hung after William Hung with a pretty chick in his arms. Thus, I have come up with a list of hypotheses that can explain this terrible and sickening phenomenon:

1. It is currently 'in'/'happening' to get ugly boyfriends.

2. God designed human beings to be attracted to complete opposites.

3. Guys with lots of muscles often have small testicles, hence Girls with beauty often have primitive, microscopic brains.

4. There is beauty in ugliness. UGLINESS.

5. But he is such a sweet guy! ohcomeonlah.

6. Make no mistake, ALL ugly guys are rich.

7. All pretty girls suffer from low self-esteem, hence settle for much less than average.

8. All ugly guys goto the bomoh for voodoo shit and charms and sticks and branches and dolls and make all the pretty girls want to take off their underpants.

9. Ugly guys possess an innate ability to sweet talk extremely well. 

10. Said pretty girls have already had all kinds of boyfriends: tall/short/long/fat/thin/smart/ and now want to try a new kind: "ugly". And no, UGLY is in a class of its own. You can never be smart and ugly. nono. Ugly is ugly.

11. Pretty girls want to remain virgins for the rest of their lives.

12. Ugly guys: God messed up, He's terribly sorry. Hence the compensation.

13. Pretty girls: God overdid himself, He's trying to fix balance in society but not doing an awfully good job.

14. Records show that all pretty girls are partially blind. Both eyes.

15. Ugly men tend to repel normal people hence their ability create a void between chicks and humans(get chicks first).

16. It is said (for obvious reasons) that ugly men are infinitely more loyal than normal men. 

17. Pretty girls were born with their hearts full of compassion.

18. Like different attire for different occasions, it is purely situational. 
When pretty girl wants to impress her friends she takes Mr.Handsome out. But now, it is "kegawatan ekonomi" so she takes Mr.Uglyrich out instead.

19. Ugly men are sooo funny and charming and witty. right. and handsome too. bleh.

20. Everyone gets a chance at achieving something great for once in their lifetime.


Hopefully, scientists in the near future will be able to provide us with a more detailed explanation and more importantly, the cure for this condition.

3 comments:

Nick said...

I think i know who post this, I'm sure this gonna be ur work.. u said it to me before..
But then u are not correct for all dude.. i agree part of it but there is also something i did not agree.. I'm ugly but i'm not rich.. and I'm ugly but i did not get a hot chick instead.. there is no ugly guy + hot chick theory.. it is just how u look or act upon to someone.. date is all bout fate and feeling, if there is no feeling occurs it surely not going to last long but wat we mostly can see is those date can last very long, am i right??.. appreciate what u have dude.. hehe.. take care :X

Eric Koh said...

You're not ugly ok. That's why you didn't get a hot chick just like the rest of us. haha

Nick said...

i am.. lol...
btw..u post it??